The “Talk”

December 8, 2009

I know, I know.  It’s been a long time.  It usually takes something particularly interesting to draw me back in.

This time it was because I wanted to direct you to this recent article on Time’s website about having “the talk” with our kids.  One of the things I appreciate about the article is that it actually encourages having multiple “talks” rather than just one, each one being age/situation appropriate.

I also wonder about having “the talk” in Christian households.  How is it different? How can we speak about sex with our children in a way that is open and honest and reflective of our faith?

Anybody out there who has more experience than I do, feel free to jump in.  Both of our boys have shown some curiosity about “where babies come from,” but were satisfied with the most cursory of answers.  This article makes me think we will be dealing with this sooner rather than later.  What about you?

Posted by Robert | Filed Under Blog 
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5 Responses to “The “Talk””

  1. Brandi on December 8th, 2009 5:27 pm

    Funny you should mention this. I just ordered a book about this very thing at the recommendation of a friend. The book says start early, it’s never to late to start and have the conversation more than once.

    Having a daughter, turning nine I know it’s coming. We’ve already had conversations that ended with red faces. I hope to develop a relationship with all three daughters to encourage conversations. They’ve already come home from school with interesting stories about what they think sex is…hence ordering this book. I’ll let you know how it works out.

  2. Robert on December 8th, 2009 5:42 pm

    Brandi–Would you recommend the book, as well? If so, what’s the title?

  3. Lisa on December 8th, 2009 6:20 pm

    We’ve been having the talk with our older girls for several years now. Madison was curious while I was pregnant with Allison, so I decided it was time to make it a regular conversation. Our talks are always in the kitchen, very relaxed, non-threatening while I am cooking or cleaning up after dinner. At first it was a little awkward but it gets easier, even with the addition of more information and details. Greg and I decided that we want our girls to think of sex as a gift that God has given them to share with their future husbands. It is something beautiful and precious. We use things that we see on tv and in their daily lives as jumping off points for conversation starters. I have found that they want to to discuss their thoughts on sex without being afraid of how we will react. I am thrilled when they come to me to talk about it. I want them to have a clear picture of the world’s view on sex and then know our stance on how to counter act that view.

  4. Disa Adams on December 8th, 2009 8:13 pm

    I am extremely interested in this topic as well. Jon and I are currently expecting our fourth (and last ) child but with Eric already 10 and Julie rapidly approaching 8 I know the questions will begin soon. I would appreciate any advice you get from the experienced group!!! Thanks. Disa

  5. geraldine on December 9th, 2009 3:07 am

    I have a few thoughts on this topic after raising our 4 daughters. Let me begin by saying I, in NO way, consider myself to be any sort of expert!!! 8^)

    First of all, we always used proper names for everything. Being comfortable with the words is important, so we said penis, vagina, urinate, defecate, flatulate, etc. etc. Secondly, we NEVER referred to any woman as ‘having a baby in her tummy’. We always said ‘in her uterus’ as no one ate the baby! We explained that the uterus was a special place that God made for babies to grow. It just seemed a natural progression to then later explain how the baby got there. Our oldest daughter was about 7 when she asked. Naturally, all the other girls learned at an even earlier age. It was all very matter of fact and they didn’t seem to think anything of it.

    Books help too….and nerves of steel….
    geraldine

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