Firm Foundation
A while back, when Rachel and I were driving through New Mexico, we were amused by some of the peculiarly worded road signs. One, that was clearly written by a philosophy major said, “Caution: High winds may exist.” It would have been funnier if, in parentheses, the sign had added, “Theoretically speaking.” Then there was the one that ominously warned: “Hitchhikers may be escaped convicts.” Man. Somebody’s a real Negative Nelly! It made me think of other scary options: “Hitchhikers may be Barry Manilow fans.” “Hitchhikers may have just eaten a chilidog.” (For the record, kids: Don’t pick up hitchhikers.)
I found some other signs on the internet that made me laugh:
• Caution: This sign has sharp edges. Do not touch the edges of this sign.
• Caution: Do not hit this sign.
• Danger: Hazardous Fumes, Steep Cliffs, Rough Surface, Hot Lava. Flashlight required after dark.
Then there are the funny warning labels that companies feel compelled to use in order to avoid lawsuits from an overly litigious and common sense deficient customer base:
• On a hairdryer: “Do not use while sleeping.”
• On an iron: “Do not iron clothes while on the body.”
• On Windex: “Do not spray in eyes.”
• On a Baby Stroller: “Remove Child before folding.”
• On a laser printer: “Do not eat printer toner.”
• On an industrial drill: “Not to be used as a dental drill.”
Not that warnings are a bad idea. There are plenty to be found in scripture. This Sunday we’ll return to one that we talked about at the beginning of the year. It helps make up our theme verse for 2010. We’ve reached the end of Jesus’ Sermon on the Mount, and we’ve come back around to a warning and a promise from Jesus—a promise to those who will put his words, this sermon, into practice and a warning for those who don’t.